Taking the "easy way" is not a particularly popular approach to success and life. Consider this quote: "The path of least resistance is the path of the loser" (H.G. Wells) When I tried to find a contrasting quote that stated the virtues of a life lived with ease, I came up empty-handed. Not one to force the matter, I'm going to rely on my own intuition and experience: forcing things - applying … [Read more...]
Living Transformation
It's been a challenging week. Last Monday, I received news from my vet that my 15-year-old cat, Fiona, was not going to live forever. On Tuesday, blood test results came back. It wasn't good. Her kidneys were kaput. He was forecasting that without intervention, she would live a month, at most. A transformation took place within me: I started to see Fiona as a cat that was dying, instead of one … [Read more...]
Disagreeing with Dale
I have a bone to pick with Dale Carnegie. He states that in order to "to win friends and influence people" you should "talk about your own mistakes first." He provides several examples, stating "Admitting one's own mistakes--even when one hasn't corrected them--can help convince somebody to change his behavior." Carnegie suggests humility, then praise, then criticism. For example: "I'm not nearly … [Read more...]
The Myth of “Self”-Help
Self-reliant. Self-help. Self-made millionaire. We are a culture that values independence and the "can-do" spirit of the individual. The words above are commonly used to reflect those values. I believe that by using such words, we are reinforcing an unrealistic and impossible expectation. While we are individuals, we are never totally "independent." The real heart and soul of life comes from … [Read more...]
A Beginner’s Mind
When I decided to enroll in a coach training program, it took a while for a certain reality to fully sink in: I was going back to school. While it's not school in the traditional sense, it pushes the same buttons. The biggest button, lit up and flashing wildly, is the "good student" button. It's the voice that tells me that I have to be perfect, a straight-A student. It tells me I have do … [Read more...]
An Attitude of Gratitude
In the 2001 movie "America's Sweethearts," Eddie (John Cusak) spends some time in a wellness center, recovering from the very public breakup of his celebrity marriage. Part of his program includes expressing gratitude: "I'm grateful for the earth... I'm grateful for the stars and the sky..." While the movie portrays his chanting of gratitude as a point of comic relief, there's truth to the … [Read more...]
Writing a New Personal Story
Growing up, the two best days of the year were the last day of school and the first day of school. It's always felt as though September - with classes starting, people getting back down to business, the change in the leaves, air and light - was a fresh start, akin to New Year's Day. I used to practice my handwriting in my new notebooks, trying to decide who I was going to be that school year. Fat … [Read more...]
Open Mind, Open Doors
This past week I led a lively discussion about empowering language with a group of women from Courage 360 (formerly Washington Women's Employment & Education), and towards the end of the class, one young lady commented, "I know you said that using these disempowering words is draining, but I'm feeling drained trying to catch myself using them and then figuring out what to replace them with! My … [Read more...]
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